I read an article recently by a woman who had been moved to a nursing home. No wait, it wasn’t a nursing home; it was a senior care center. That sounds better, don’t you think? Nursing Home implies that there are a bunch of nurses taking care of you because you’re sick. Senior’s Care Center sounds like there are fun people just waiting to help you out should you get stuck in the tub or something. Semantics are everything.
I’m not sure the writer of the article was 100% mentally intact, but there was one part of her article that stood out to me. She noted that all of the salt and pepper shakers in her care center had been replaced with Mrs. Dash, a supposedly healthy seasoning alternative. I’m sure the care center means well and wants their patients to be in good health but let’s be real; what difference does it make? It’s a nursing home for pity sake! How healthy do they need to be?
Shortly after reading the article I had a conversation with my daughter-in-law. Having three boys, I’m anticipating that she might have some say in my care when I’m older. Here’s what I told her, “f and when I need to go into a care facility give me salt. Give me salt, give me chocolate, and give me plenty of Dr. Pepper. I have watched what I eat for most of my life. By the time I’m in the home, I want to be done with all that. Give me a few short years, months, or even days of enjoyment. LET ME EAT THE STINKIN’ SALT!
I don’t think a little freedom in the food department is too much to ask for in my final days, do you? That, and someone to come in and take care of my unsightly chin hair. That’s all.