I hear the comments.

I read the comments.

…the comments of people on the “filtered” lives of others and how they aren’t real.

…the comments of people on the “filtered” photos of others and how they aren’t real.

Well, in a sense, the lives and photos pictured are not real in totality, and there may be a bigger story behind them, but why is there such a struggle to simply be happy for someone else? It’s ridiculous for a person to have to explain every detail behind it so others can now have a complete, whole, perspective of that photo and thus accept it.

Let’s get real.

It’s not about the photo. It’s about our hearts. It’s about our feelings. It’s about our pride.

It’s not about them…it’s about us.

In order to feel at peace with ourselves, our looks, our progress, etc., for some reason we feel the need to proclaim, “that isn’t real.”

I think we put too much finality on our own “observations.”

Is our faulty conclusion of a person and the portrayal of their life going to change how we’re supposed to love them, bless them, raise them up and affirm them in what they are doing well, or impact them the way God intended?

No, it’s not.

We shouldn’t cut others out of our lives for those reasons; instead, we need to work and grow through what makes us feel threatened. Otherwise, we are allowing jealousy, comparison, and misguided assumptions to stump our heart and the godly actions we are meant to walk in.

On the flipside of the flipside, even if you know that it’s a “you problem” rather than a “them problem” and admit it, yet continue to cut people out in the name of “boundaries,” you are still allowing jealousy, comparison, insecurities, and pride to win over.

Don’t do it!

Somehow, because it’s social media, we reason that it’s okay to “unfollow” and “unfriend” someone because they made us feel jealous and insecure. That poison takes seed in your heart and soul, gets watered, and eventually grows because you’re not truly dealing with the ugly feelings you try to smother. Eventually, in small and big ways, you will cut out people and hold back from blessing others. Why? Because you are practicing cutting others out based on how you feel, whether you’re willing to admit it or not.

Even if you take social media away, eventually, you will have those same feelings toward the people who surround you, whether you like it or not. Then, what are you left with?

What is real?

What is real, is that we are all human and have struggles no matter how good a person looks…no matter how good their filtered and unfiltered photos look…no matter how good their belongings look…no matter how good their circumstances look…

What is real, is that we glamorize insecure and jealous feelings to be “relatable” and “acceptable” because of their appeal to society, and then call these walls “boundaries.” That’s not a boundary, that’s self-imprisonment and shunning others.

What is real, is that we have a God who cares for us so much that we don’t have to worry about how much we allow ourselves to care for others.

What is real, is carrying on with life and raising others up, rather than pushing others away and calling it worthy–it’s living through our self-conscious, insecure feelings.

What is real, is that we have feelings we need to deal with and are wrong when we cut other people out over our own issues, rather than feel (or try to feel) happy for them, give a gift, and actually bless them with the most encouraging words EVER.

What is real, is that we spew thankfulness without being happy for others, when in reality, the two go hand-in-hand.

What is real, is that we should get to know the people behind the photo better and be the love of God in their lives, rather than pick them apart.

Robyn McLean

Author Robyn McLean

Robyn McLean is an inspirational and motivational speaker/writer on a wide spectrum of topics. She temporarily resides in The Dalles, Oregon, with her husband and son. Robyn enjoys playing the piano, singing, hiking, designing, trying new food, and sharing coffee time with people. Official Website: www.CoffeeWithRobyn.com // Stay Connected: www.facebook.com/CoffeeWithRobyn

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