Be humble and gentle.  Be patient with each other, making allowances for each other’s faults because of your love.  Ephesians 4:2

Hmmm.  Not exactly what I wanted to hear this morning as I opened my Bible for a little time with Jesus. 

What I REALLY wanted to hear was, “Your husband is a jerk… thus sayeth the Lord… and therefore you may treat him however you want, wallow in self pity, and spend the day really ticked off…”  Now, THAT will preach.

But no.  The Lord of my life once again opened my eyes to the darkness in my own heart.

“Be humble, Kristie.”  Don’t think that you’ve got it all figured out and Jeff does not have a clue.  Realize that you are wrong.  Even when it’s very clear that HE is wrong 🙂 – there is still some part of you, some reaction or judgment that you need to let go of. 

“Be gentle, Kristie.”  When I’m hurting, I want to hurt back.  When I feel mistreated, I want to make sure that he knows just how badly he made me feel.  When I’m angry, sometimes my words are harsh and unkind and I don’t care whether or not they hurt him.  

“Be patient, Kristie.”  Don’t react.  Don’t push.  Don’t demand.  Take a deep breath. 

“Make allowance for each other’s faults, Kristie.”  Wow.  I have to remember that he’s not perfect.  I am not perfect.  If we’re going to walk through this life together for the next 60 years, there has to be room to be human.  To make mistakes.  To not handle things well.  To say the wrong thing.  To make the wrong choice.  

When I fail, I hope that Jeff’s response to me is gracious, forgiving.  I want to hear, “it’s ok honey, we all screw things up.  I forgive you.”  I want him to let it go, and not hold it over my head.

Why is it so much harder to offer the same softness to someone else when you’re upset with them?  And how about the times that they don’t even ASK for forgiveness?  You mean I need to make allowance for the faults that they won’t even admit they have?!?  Hmmmmmm…..

Be patient.  Be gentle.  Be humble.  Make allowance for each other’s faults.

Because of your love.