Several weeks ago the Lord and I were doing some business! At 40 “something” years old, I was just crying out to Him because I felt so “stopped” by my insecurities over body image issues. At 5’10” (this tall in 6th grade) with large feet and hands for a woman, I mostly tower about 6’ with shoes on and have a wing span that cowers most men. I was actually in a band called “One Tall Woman!”
I usually make jokes about this but have never truly let them know the extent that I feel thwarted. Humbly, the Lord places me in leadership roles and most women would describe me as “Stately” or “Solid” (ergh), or “Dignified.” But truly, this is the last thing I have felt in my heart. The enemy has been robbing my mind by having me constantly question my place in this world simply because of my height/size.
So, in desperation I specifically prayed over this area of my life and asked the Lord to reveal “keys” to me of how to defeat the enemy. I kept hearing in that still small voice, “You need to accept your frame.” How odd! Really? So I began praying over accepting my frame and just recently was led to see if the word “frame” was even in the Bible. God is SO good…look at this:
Psalm 139: 13-16 says, You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.”
The Hebrew transliteration for the word, “Frame” is: ‘otsem; meaning: power, bones, might.
Ironically, every time I sensed that the enemy was defeating me with negative thought patterns, I literally felt my “strength and power” being sucked out of me. I hardly knew how to resist or fight back because I was agreeing with him – I didn’t like it either. I had NO might whatsoever.
I had always been “comparing” and “longing” to have a smaller frame. I knew my foundation in the Lord was secure – but too small. What do I mean by that? Well, God is all sufficient – but I can only know (by experience) that sufficiency in the areas that I surrendered to Him. I had surrendered about 5’5” of me and about ½ my weight, but since I didn’t like the rest of me, somehow I didn’t think God did either.
I’m so grateful that God revealed this lack of surrender. I have asked His forgiveness for not receiving the frame that He made for me and for comparing myself to others. I’ve asked Him heal my mind and show me His plan for His temple in my frame. God has also led me to make healthier choices so I can have enough energy to serve Him effectively. It has been life-changing and affirming to God’s perfect plan for me!
How about you? What ways might your mind wander to thoughts of comparison or negative self talk? Don’t let the enemy rob you of the joy God intended for you to give you strength. “The joy of the Lord should be our strength, for the Holy Spirit Who indwells us is the Oil of Joy,” Psalm 45:7, NKJV. Take every thought captive (2 Corinthians 10:5) under the obedience of Christ and receive your frame so that you can glorify God in it!
Dear Beautiful Pam,
Thanks for such a relatable story. We women are all so prone to compare ourselves, and of course fall short. So we feel inadequate and the evil one keeps us unproductive for our Lord. Yes, thank you Lord for the frame you made for me. We just have to keep fighting to get past ourselves, keep our eyes on Jesus, and glorify God. Keep on writing.
For what it’s worth, I wish I was 5’10”.
your words of honesty and transparency are so welcoming……your life journey depicts an idenity reality so many women face. You have challenged each women to humbly acknowledge her divine creator and divine design! What a beautiful expression of God at work in your heart and life.
That is a practical exposition that builds many irrespective stature and state.God bless your family and work
Awesome word, Pam! And by the way, I would never describe you as “stately” or “solid”. I would describe you as “strikingly beautiful.”