I can’t do it.
Some days I feel so overwhelmed that I wish the floor would swallow me up or at least wish I could crawl back under the covers for a century or so.
Worry. Anxiety. Doubt. Insecurity.
I’m consumed with anxiety over our church and personal finances as well as how a potential ministry change will affect those already miniscule funds. Will the church be able to pay our salaries? If not, how will we pay our bills?
Doubt over whether our church is being effective seeps in. Is Christ truly transforming people because of our ministry, or are we just something for people to do on Sundays?
I wrestle with insecurity about whether I will ever fulfill the dream placed in my heart. Will I ever be good enough? Even if I am good enough, will my dream ever be reality?
My nerves are frazzled. I end up taking it out on my kids. Then, I feel like a lousy mom. Naturally, all my emotions also blast my husband, so I feel like a lousy wife, too.
Don’t forget about all the other details – my house is a mess, something is scheduled every night of the week, we’re buying a house, making decisions regarding the future of our ministry, I could stand to eat a few less cookies, I haven’t made enough time for family and friends, people are starving around the world, natural disasters, school shootings, human trafficking, the economy, disagreements with foreign nations, threats of war, and the list goes on.
I can’t do it. I can’t.
Unfortunately, the floor isn’t going to swallow me, and I can’t crawl under my bed covers. I have to keep on whether I feel like it or not. What gets me out of bed? Faith.
I worry, and God reminds me of His words in Matthew 6:25 – “Do not worry about your life.” Verse 32 tells me that He knows what I need. Instead of worry, Jesus said to seek first His kingdom and His righteousness (verse 33).
I feel anxious, and God reminds me of Philippians 4:6 – “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, in prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”
I feel insecure, and God reminds me of Philippians 1:6 – “Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
When I’m feeling overwhelmed and that I can’t do it, I turn to Him. I cry out to Him. I search His word. I recall those passages that I have studied when life is good and simple. I focus my mind on the times He has proven Himself before. I cling to Him.
On my own I can’t do it.
However, “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength,” Philippians 4:13.
Where do you feel overwhelmed? What truths do you need to be reminded of? Where will you look to find them?