It’s 3:50 A.M. and once again my mind whirls like tiny dirt devils whisking up thoughts, cares, and worries for the day. I am a human being faced with challenges, ideas, and life.
There are many times when I sit and stare blankly at my computer screen. “What should I write today, Father?” is the prayer bouncing around inside my head. Nothing comes.
I continue to stare at the blank white screen and blinking curser waiting for that great idea, clever words or inspired thought to whisk away my fear of writing failure…and still…nothing comes.
In the silence of my second cup of coffee, I finally hear something. Shhh…It’s the still small voice – the stirring of the Holy Spirit gently leading me into that quiet place in my heart where I can focus on not his words, but the meaning of his words.
He’s telling me that what I will write are pieces from my own heart, my own life and my own problems. My mind begins to race and I begin to worry. Pieces…about me? I gulp, worry and begin to fear the worst. That means putting myself out there for everyone to see. And then he tells me “Be still, and know that I am God.”
“But God,” my heart murmurs, “I want to write about things that matter to other people.”
“You are,” is his reply. “I allow you to go through things for your good and for other’s. Don’t wish for anything other than lessons. I will give you the words to share, encouragement for the down-trodden and life-giving stories of salvation. Julie, salvation is a daily exercise for my children – and you. Ask me to save you again today…and I will.”
Do you ever feel as though you need to be saved from yourself? If so, that’s the best place to be, because it means that you’ve realized that you can’t do life in your own strength anymore and that you have a deep need for God to take it from here. Let him in…he won’t fail you. I promise.
“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you”, says the Lord, “thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
Jeremiah 29:11 NKJV
Sweet Father, Lord Jesus, and Precious Holy Spirit: I need you. Throughout my life I’ve tried to do things in my own strength and with my own wisdom. Through all of the blood, sweet and tears of the life lessons I’ve been through and even thrust myself into, I have failed. I need you today to save me from me. Save me from wishing, wanting and praying for things that you haven’t designed for me to have in my life. Save me from my thoughts of dislike and in some cases hostility toward those people who have wronged me. Save me from trying to be someone you haven’t created me to be. Save me from my own desperate, fear-filled heart that runs in circles beating up myself and others along the way. Save me from believing that if I just try hard enough, things will change. Save me from being dependent on myself and independent of you. Lord, save me from me. I need you to rescue me, guard me, protect me and lead me. I can’t do life without you. Amen.